How Conflicts Relate To Your Childhood


Conflict, when managed intentionally, consciously, and with mature communication skills, is a natural, necessary, and important part of relationships and to build emotional intimacy.


When we’re triggered and experience conflict with our partner, the trigger is linked to an underlying belief, insecurity, unhealed trauma, etc. When we can trace back the trigger to the root emotion + experience, and heal that root cause, the conflict can be resolved in the present and we can heal that old wound at the same time.


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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Our relationships are powerful catalysts for our own personal growth and development when we realize this. Just last night I was looking for more affirmation (my love language) since we had a busy weekend and my husband and I hadn’t connected much. It was beautiful to be vulnerable with what I needed, to have him meet my needs, and to feel my inner child get what she also needed and didn’t get enough of growing up: to be truly seen for who she was.


Conscious relationships take work. Having this kind of awareness, communication and healing in relationship doesn’t come easy. But it is so worth it!

With Compassion,

Cassandra Solano, LCSW


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